Well, life in Texarkana has changed very little as far as I can see. Over the year I was gone the state of Arkansas began taxing groceries (which sucks), but not much else seems different.
Today I took my first solo American outing since the return. I went to Target. It was alright, though I honestly can't shop like I once did. I just don't feel like accumulating so much junk. I'm glad of the change, though I admit that I still very much like new things. Clutter bothers me now more than before. I guess it is tied to the whole idea that I will need to pack up and move again in a month and a half. I'm a nomad, I guess.
On the way to Target I felt the awkwardness of driving for the first time in a long time. It was nice, and I realized that my (now seemingly huge) SUV drives smoothly. A year in manual transmission bound Hyundai Elantra taxis will do that, I guess. Driving was liberating, though I admit that I haven't gotten the courage to attempt the highway again just yet. It seems so... fast. I'm sure that will change in the next couple of days or so.
At Target I ran into my old roommate, Jonathan, and we had a nice stroll among the toothbrushes. It was good to run into someone who I was glad to see, but probably wouldn't have just called out of the blue. I wish that more of my friends were available here now, but the truth is that I'm going to have to reconstruct a friends network when I get to school, and figure out what it will mean. I can't say that I'm looking forward to this, but I am definitely looking forward to not being so isolated.
I am considering going to work this summer a little, but I don't know if I can handle it. I mean, I just feel like structure would be good (and money couldn't hurt), but I don't know if it would go well right now. I feel kind of shell-shocked and off-kilter. Maybe in a few weeks I'll be better. I might call around and see what's up, anyway. I am afraid that my schedule will be pretty strange this summer. I'm planning on a few out-of-town jaunts of varying lengths, so I don't know what that will mean. But at the moment I have about 13¢ to my name, so roadtrips on $4/gallon are a bit far-fetched.
I hope to get to sleep tonight like a normal person. I haven't quite gotten the hang of that yet. And that sucks.
T
Temple of Heaven
3 comments:
Hi Trace, I guess now you can actually read comments that people leave you, huh? I know it must be weird to be back in your own country. That is how we feel every time we go on furlough, except the nagging feeling that we don't belong in the states anymore. It's not our home. Anyways,we will be praying for you as you transition back into life in the good ol' USA. I do hope it's ok to be saying 'real' words instead of code words now because if not, I've just blown it;) haha. Take care of yourself....Connie Murphy
By the way, I've been keeping up with every blog you've written over the time period that you were in China. Are you going to keep writing? Or end it soon? Just curious....
Hey there. I will just echo part of what my dear friend just wrote. We so know what you are going through and are thinking of you guys as you all trasition back. FYI I've been keeping up with your blog the whole time, but haven't made any comments or communication with you for obvious reasons. I know you're glad to be home, even though it feels weird. It will get better, but don't forget the things you've learned. They will tend to fade with time. Write them here - or somewhere - so you can remember. Then again, you're much younger and have a much better memory. But it won't be long.....
Saw Gingging yesterday. I think she really misses all of you - esp the boys. She was practically begging to come over and play with Carly and Caleb. We told her anytime....Thurday, Friday, and/or Saturday! LOL. Well take care. Eat at TaMolly's for me!!!!! And hug your momma!
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